Hemp: The OG Multitasker of Human History

If hemp had a LinkedIn profile, its resume would read: “10,000+ years of experience in agriculture, medicine, warfare, and saving the planet.” Let’s take a time machine through this plant’s greatest hits.

Ancient Times:

8,000 BCE: Archaeologists found hemp fibers in pottery from ancient Mesopotamia. Turns out, even cavemen loved a good hemp tote.

2,700 BCE: Emperor Shen Nung of China prescribed cannabis tea for gout and forgetfulness. (Ancient Yelp review: ★★★★☆ “Great for pain, but made me lose my sandals.”)

Middle Ages to Colonial Swagger:

1200s: Hemp sails and ropes powered European naval empires. Columbus’ ships? Basically floating hemp advertisements.

1776: The U.S. Declaration of Independence was drafted on hemp paper. Founding Fathers: “Taxation without representation? Not cool. Hemp? Very cool.”

Industrial Revolution Flex:

1941: Henry Ford built a car body from hemp plastic, fueled by hemp ethanol. The Model T’s eco-friendly cousin could’ve revolutionized transportation… until Big Oil stepped in.

Modern-Day Renaissance:

2018: The Farm Bill legalized hemp in the U.S., sparking a green rush. Today, hemp’s in your lattes, your lotions, and even your concrete.

But here’s the kicker: Hemp was nearly erased from history thanks to 20th-century prohibition. Yet like a phoenix (or Snoop Dogg), it rose from the ashes. From ancient rope to carbon-negative housing, hemp’s proving it’s not just a plant—it’s a legacy.

So next time you sip a CBD mocha or slip into hemp socks, tip your hat to the OG multitasker. History’s MVP is back, and it’s here to stay.